Each intensive is tailored to the couple according to their specific needs.
5 Individual coaching sessions are required prior to the intensive (10 total sessions)
This is to prepare each spouse and is vital to the outcome of your intensive. (*Note: If 1 or both spouses are not fully committed during these sessions, we may not move forward with the intensive.)
The 5 individual pre-coaching sessions content
(laying the groundwork for the intensive)
1. Tell us your story to help us grasp all the areas that have led up to where you are now. / Secrets make you sick. We will ensure all secrets are revealed. (It sounds like this has taken place)
2. The 4 tires of life. In this video we help you discover where you stand as of right now in the 4 key areas of life and we look at where you are currently in these 4 areas & how you can fill yourself up to begin working towards being a whole and complete individual.
3. Personal Vision. Having clarity around what you are committed to in your life and how clarity around this supports your big picture. You will discover what IS your purpose in life. When you have clarity & purpose, this fuels the mind to be more creative for endless possibilities for you and your life.
4. The internal vortex: These are the thorns that you have from your past that are still impacting you today. You will discover how these thorns impact you without anyone else entering the picture.
5. The 20/80 rule is a POWERFUL life tool. This tool will help you conquer triggers, PTSD, intrusive thoughts and emotions that plague our minds and hearts. This tool brings freedom!
Intensive sessions
Each Intensive is tailored to the individual couple according to the package chosen. The 3 day intensive covers all the content below.
Discovering Thorns
In this conversation we are discussing the following…
1. We were born to love, yet we learn to fear....Fear is the root of all problems.
2. The fear comes from the part of me inside that's not ok with itself, in facing life because its not under my control.
3. What to do with fear when it shows up.
4. When fear is present, my energy becomes blocked therefore keeping the heart from opening and receiving energy & love. This also impacts our health in major ways.
5. We discover your root of fear and how we build our lives around this thorn, impacting us in a massive way as adults and especially in a close relationship.
6. We revisit the 20/80 rule and how this applies to your thorn.
7. With every thorn, there is a false story we tell ourselves, and you will learn how to separate this story to be able to let go of it for good.
Inner roommate
In this conversation we are discussing the following…
Who are YOU and how did you get to be this way.
1. We all have 45-65K thoughts a day.
2. The brain is a meaning making machine and wants to make a meaning out of everything!
3. The impact of what we see and hear during ages 0-7 and how our thoughts are connected.
4. How I relate to my thoughts like it's ME & try to control the environment I live in.
5. We introduce a powerful life rule..20/80.
6. How we alter reality out of protection and defense.
6 Levels of intimacy
In this conversation you will discover the following…
1. The 6 levels of intimacy (communication) in marriage. This conversation will set you up for all the conversations to come in this course and it's super important to understand each level and where most of your current conversations live.
2. In discovering the 6 levels of intimacy, we talk about how emotional walls are formed and that having "safety" in the relationship to be able to share with each other and how vitally important this is to the health of your relationship, as well as the relationships of others around you.
Creating Emotional safety
In this conversation you discover as a couple how to create a safe environment, and be an emotionally safe spouse so that your spouse can share thoughts, emotions, and feelings without being shut down.
Vicious Vortex of Death
In this conversation you will discover the following…
1. How these thorns in our heart create a Vicious Vortex of Death in relationships and how it ultimately keeps us from experiencing true intimacy in our marriage.
2. When we protect our thorns (fears) it keeps our hearts closed. It keeps love out and it's a breeding ground for the enemy to attack you. When our heart is injured, we cannot have complete intimacy in any relationship.
3. You will discover that it's not circumstances, events or others that makes us miserable. Its OUR THOUGHTS ABOUT those things that makes us miserable.
4. You will discover your own Vicious Vortex Cycle in your marriage as well as how other around you can also trigger this cycle in yourself.
5. We will tie together from the last conversation we had in how the body sensations you feel are the KEY to freedom from this Vortex.
The H.O.T. cycle
In this conversation you will discover the following…
1. What being H.O.T. means
2. How to take a pause in conversation to allow for you to take care of your heart.
3. The key ingredient to intimacy & oneness.
4. Why our hearts close toward people we love and how to reopen your heart to your spouse.
5. How codependency plays in marriage.
6. What it means to be whole and complete.
7. How to care for your own heart when you feel unsafe in conversation.
8. How gratitude plays a huge part in our lives.
Discover true forgiveness
In this conversation we discover what true forgiveness is and how to be complete with yourself and your spouse.
The H.O.T. conversation
In this conversation you will discover the following…
1. Practical ways to honor your spouse as the daughter or son of Christ.
2. How to come back and have level 6 conversation after you have taken a pause around a triggered subject.
3. How to effectively listen to understand.
4. The 4 key ingredients in communication.
5. How to create a winners circle so that everyone wins in the relationship.
Rebuilding Trust
It’s so important to have INTEGRITY with myself first, then with my spouse. A new marriage cannot be built on secrets. So let’s look at "what is integrity?" first and "how do I begin having integrity with myself & my spouse?"
Marriage vision
We believe every marriage needs a vision. In this conversation we talk about the following
1. Having clarity around where you are headed as a couple and how clarity supports the big picture
2. Knowing your purpose as a couple.
3. When we have clarity & purpose, this fuels the mind to be more creative
4. Having an open heart in the relationship fuels passion.
5. When all of these are present, it has me showing up differently in my every day actions as we work toward a common goal together.
H.O.T. Sex- Physical intimacy and Gods plan for oneness
In this conversation we are discussing the following…
1. We look at when safety & openness are present, this equals intimacy.
2. When either spouse has a closed heart, intimacy is limited.
3. We look at how God made a man & woman so drastically different and how this plays into sexual intimacy.
4. We look at specifically what women need when it comes to emotional, and sexual intimacy.
5. We look at how research reveals that 83% of wives say their husbands don't understand their need for EMOTIONAL intimacy, While an identical 83% of husbands report that their wives don't understand their need for SEXUAL intimacy.
6. We share best practices & pitfalls to avoid in the bedroom.
